Hope you've all had a wonderful weekend! Mine has consisted of devouring sunshine, writing a bit, reading books, wandering around these lands, cooking, eating, bathing, resting, conversing. All the things I do pretty much every day all day now. It is amazing how all the only few things I want to be doing, have manifested so beautifully into existence for this most meaningful and exciting time of my life. I may never be in this situation again. Pregnant. Expecting my own child's arrival. This may be the only time in my life that I get to experience all of this. This great new adventure unfolding. The anticipation of something so immense. And so I cannot be grateful enough to universe, myself and my partner, or whoever is in charge of this all, for having lined up life to be exactly what I would ever want from life. Right now. In this specific kind of situation.
There is nothing I would want more from life. It is not very common to feel this peace and immense contentment, at least not such long lasting. I've felt the same sort of super contentment in the past, but only moment to moment. Maybe a day or two at max. It now feels as if my whole existence is aligned with what is true and right and perfectly exactly in the way in which it is meant to. There's a beautiful harmony and calm in that.
This photo is from our landlords barn next door. He's got a dining room/bar in there that is currently being fixed for the summer. Great views over the fields and our ever growing seedlings and plants from there.
A few photos from the last couple weeks:
Blooming apple and plum trees in our garden. The flowers arrived late, due to the warmth arriving later than normal. And unfortunately the flowers are almost all gone again. Blown by the wind. Trees moving into a new phase in their cycle.
In the evenings we've sat by the fire. Dreaming and speaking of places to go. Houses to renovate and transform into our dream home. Discussing which kinds of horses to buy when we have found that dream house.
This is kind of the dream life situation we are looking for. Minus 3 or 2 kids. And maybe add a Shire horse, another warmblood, and a little Shetland pony. Mountain and lake nearby. All the food we can and want to eat in the garden.
Dreams really do keep us alive. I always say that we are the creators of our own lives. And however magical and nonsensical that may appear to skeptics, I believe that life offers more magical powers than what we often dare to believe. I believe that if we trust in magic and our unlimited power of creating, without letting fear and doubt come in the way, all of our dreams and wishes can be presented to us. Even more than hard work and ambition, believing and trusting, are the foundations for achieving all of our dreams and desires. At least that is my theory.
I made another type of granola the other day, and T made a great dandelion cordial (recipe coming for both).
Belly is quite big now. Have felt a few random contractions here and there. Besides the ones you feel when you orgasm. Each time I excitedly think; ah it's on the way! Before it dies out and things are back to normal. Guess it's body's way to test drive. And I appreciate the random occurrences where we momentarily get to see and feel how it would affect us mentally, if it would have been for real already. It's all very exciting. But still so hard to understand anything of how getting into labour will feel like. No matter how many stories people will tell you, it can only be a very unique and personal experience. Exactly what we are looking for. Making it our own unique experience.
Evenings here are stunning. As are mornings, middays and afternoons.... somehow it feels like time stands still and that this place is the only place that exists. Have you ever felt that way anywhere? That feeling allows you to zoom out from all that isn't important. There's great relief and peace in feeling; this right here, is the only thing that matters.
Have sowed new parsley and basil seeds, and planted out older herb plants outdoors.
Have had friends and family visiting and on one occasion we made sweet potato fries, cumin celery lentil, stuffed peppers, marinated tofu and some salads.
And watermelon, naturally.
My brother and his daughter.
One of the two yoga teachers that I organized a retreat with in my home in Greece last summer came for a visit, with one of the retreat guests. Amazingly, four of us nine women of the retreat got pregnant after that week. My food must be full of so much nurturing qualities that help with fertility ;) Two of us pregnant ones in the above pic.
My good friend Ewa, the other yoga teacher that was part of that wonderful week last summer, is organizing a great new summer retreat in Italy this summer. Check out her site for more details.
My friend Mercedes from Miami sent me the photo to the left the other day. She had found me on a page of a Citibank Aadvantage credit card offer. The other two photos are behind the scenes pics from those few days during which that campaign was shot, in Santorini, Greece last summer. A neighbour island to the island where I lived for a year. There's a video on Youtube here where you can see me diving off a sail boat for a brief second. At 0.09. Was shown in airport lounges around the US apparently.
So many beautiful memories to share from my year in Greece. Still yet to come.
One of my favourite places.... spending much time here contemplating life, watching the cats play outdoors, listening to the birds outside and to the playlist I've made for the birthing day. Feeling the anticipation building. Not in an urgent way. It's just slowly building up and I feel more connected to the baby and the process every day.
At the same time; there are so many times in the day that we say: I can't wait to meet our baby! ... so much for being patient.
How will life change after this? Soon we'll know...